Skiing, skating, snowboarding, sledding... They’ll have to cancel the whole winter Olympics. If you run a ski gear retail outlet, maybe think about a surf franchise instead. Ski resort operators – install pools and waterslides.
2. Jobs
Those Ukranian ice fishermen will all have to buy boats. Firewood guys will need new careers.
On the other hand, beauty therapists with waxing expertise will be in high demand, as will airconditioner sales people.
3. Stores
Stores like Ice, Cold Rock and Snowgum will have to change their names to stay relevant.
4. Food
Icy poles and ice creams will melt before they get to your mouth. Ditto ice cubes. Soup will be off the menu – who wants a hearty minestrone when it’s sweltering? Okay, maybe gazpacho with survive.
Cool climate wines will be off the wine list – I hate Riesling, anyway.
5. Animals
Polar bears and snowy owls will have to change colour. Penguins won’t huddle. Birds won’t fly south.
6. Clothes
Aagh! No more sexy knee-highs, cute polo necks, schmick coats or woolly scarves.
No room for winter stubble - no rest from hair removal and spray tanning.
On the other hand, lots of bikinis, miniskirts and tank tops.
7. Movies
Love in a cold climate, Ice princess, Snow falling on cedars and Ice age will be moved to the ‘historical’ shelf.
Image: Hal Brindley
(doctored by The Monstress)
On the positive side ... I'll have a waterfront property
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