I’m glad I’m not:
1. a cockroach – the female mates only once and is pregnant for the rest of her life
2. a dentist, gynaecologist or proctologist – everybody would hate me and I'd have to spend my life poking around in strangers’ orifices
3. a tastebud – it only lives ten days
4. a teenager – you can keep all that drama and angst; once was plenty
5. bored – boredom is my idea of Hell
6. someone's appendix – just a pointless existence, really
7. the letter Q – the least used letter and often the cause of me losing Scrabble games
8. Justin Bieber – he’s a tosser
9. Muslim – women and Islam are just not a good combination (besides, I’d look crap in a burqua)
10. toilet paper, pads or tampons – if I need to explain that one, there’s something wrong with you
11. Susan Blyth Neill-Fraser – I reckon she's having a pretty shit day, today
12. a fly – after eating, a fly regurgitates its food and then eats it again (ick!)
13. poor – hello? Myer sale, bling, holidays, hair product, architects, Maldini...
14. dead – I’m too busy to die
15. fat – or really tiny for that matter, not being able to buy clothes off the rack would suck
16. Hold With Hope (Greenland) – this has got to be the place with the stupidest name in the world; at least Lord Berkeley's Knob (Scotland) and Middle Intercourse Island (Australia) have the rude factor going for them
17. freelancing anymore – now I have extra time to fill up with new activities to spike my blood pressure and exhaust me
18. Comic Sans – the world’s most loathed font (don't forget to vote in the poll on the right)
19. aspic – aspic is such a Neville no-friends, everyone leaves it on the paté plate
20. an emo – being an apathetic yet melodramatic teen with hair constantly in your face, ridiculous clothes and barely intelligible affected music in your ears sounds too much like hard work.
Enjoying all of these :P Can't figure out which one I like the best... :)
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