We’ve all heard some the weird things people write on their resumés. Here are 10 of my favourites.
1. My ruthlessness terrorised the competition and can sometimes offend.
2. Married, eight children. Prefer frequent travel.
3. Graduated in the top 66% of my class.
4. I am a rabid typist.
5. I am a wedge with a sponge taped to it. My purpose is to wedge myself into someone’s door to absorb as much as possible.
6. I’m intrested [sic] to here [sic] more about that. I’m working today in a furniture factory as a drawer.
7. My fortune cookie said, ‘Your next interview will result in a job’. And I like your company in particular.
8. I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience.
9. I saw your ad on the information highway and I came to a screeching halt.
10. I eat computers for lunch.
It's a wonder unemployment isn't higher.
(See also 13 real resume comments.)
Image: graur razvan ionut
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